This month marks 7 years of debt free living for the Rhoten household. I'm taking a break today from my personal branding posts to reflect on what being debt free has meant to our family and why you MUST become debt free.
On August 23, 2004, life caught up with me in a big way. In fact, it smacked me in the face like a 4″ X 6″. It was so unexpected that when the reality hit me, it created a permanent impact on me. I will never forget this day, it is as etched in my brain as my wedding day and birthdays of my sons. The impact of this day would be felt by my entire family and would result in a change to my family tree forever. You see on August 23, 2004, I came home to $65,000 in debt via note attached to my front door.
In retrospect, the signs were all there but like many others I just never paid attention. Imagine my surprise as I unfurled what I thought was just another rolled up lawn care service flyer stuck in the handle on my front door, only to discover that it was a mortgage foreclosure notice. It is times like this where we become the traveler on the road.
We have a choice of two paths we can take at moments like this, knowing full well that either choice will impact you for the rest of your life. You can take the well-worn path that most travel down or you can choose the path that is “grassy and wanted wear”. Either path will take you somewhere. The well-worn path is predictable and will eventually lead everyone to the same place. The grassy path, however, can take you to a place you never thought possible.
3 Reasons to become debt free
STRESS – My wife and I had always talked about money. The conversations were usually short and sweet and sounded something like this. Me: I want to buy that, is that ok? My Wife: Sure. Sometimes her answer would be: We probably shouldn't. I would usually buy it anyway. By doing so, I was continuously undermining her and minimizing her place in the household.
Think about the stress that put her under. For me, I didn't want to admit to myself or others that I actually couldn't afford to do the things we were doing. We were living a lie and deep down it was creating a divide between my wife and I. Once you become debt free all of this self-imposed stress leaves you and your relationship with your significant other improves dramatically.
SECURITY – We live in a working world where job security is as tight as walking into your local department store, meaning there really isn't any. The days of “employment of life” are long gone. Couple this reality with the fact that as an employee you can be LET GO at any time, ask yourself this question; How long could you survive with no money coming in?
The security I'm speaking of here is not the security of holding down a job but that of knowing that should the worst case scenario arise, you will be ok for awhile. Having no obligations to anyone except your family provides you with a feeling of security that you cannot comprehend until you get there yourself.
STABILITY – Being debt free provides you with the strength to stand and endure whatever life throws at you. Without this stability, you will duck and run when life's challenges present themselves. You will take the well-worn path because it is easy and you have no other options. Eventually, you will need to face these challenges and without being debt free, your choices may be dictated to you rather than you deciding the path for yourself.
It has been almost 9 years since that note arrived. I still keep it, as a reminder of the path we were on and the path we chose. Discussing money no longer causes stress among us and has, in fact, become a fun subject for us because we are working together toward a common goal. We have built up an emergency fund of 6 months worth of expenses which provides us both with a sense of security. We also now plan for fun things such as our trip to Europe which we paid for completely with cash.
I tell this embarrassing story because I hope others will benefit from it. Today, if we can't afford something with what is in our checking account, we don't buy it. We do not use or have personal credit cards. If we really want it, we start saving for it. This has provided a tremendous amount of stability in our lives. We know we can handle whatever life throws at us.
When faced with the choice of two paths, my wife and I chose the grassy path vs. the worn down one and indeed, it has made all of the difference.
QUESTION: When faced with a life changing decision which path will you choose?
